I’m less than 45 minutes away from completing one of the hardest physical challenges of my life; Fasting. When the clock strikes midnight I will have officially fasted for 3 days. 72 hours. However many minutes and seconds. I did it! I am about to conquer something that I’d never thought I do. I’m amazed, impressed and proud of myself.
Some fast to lose weight and gain strides in wellness. For me it was a test of mind and will. I researched fasting after I seen people doing a 10 day fast. That seemed way too intense for a novice like me so I read up on the 3 day water fast and fasting in general. Since it was recommended that you don’t do more than 1-3 days with out medical assistance and consultation, I set my mind to doing a water fast for 3 days.
My first day was actually fine. I completely amazed myself. I was bright, alert and focused. I was intent on hammering this challenge out. I drank my water and took the day in stride. Sure it was moments when I thought about food, but that was all subconscious conditional movement. As I went to bed on day 1 I felt great. Thinking that this wouldn’t be as hard as I thought and already was mentally preparing for my next day. Then I woke up.
Day 2 started ok, but as the day went long there was a change. A headache started to set in. Not like the slight one I had that disappeared with a cup of water like yesterday. This one was pressure. At moments severe pressure. Then there were neck aches and pains. Then I felt a little queasy. I started feeling lighter in my step and my grip didn’t seem as strong. By noon I was at work deep in the struggle. I just wanted to lay down. By later in the afternoon I didn’t want anymore water, but I knew I had to drink some just to kick those symptoms of nothing inside fueling me.
Day 2 was also when the real pep talks started. Once I got to the day and a half mark I had to remind myself that I’m progressing. I told myself I would conquer this and to not give up on myself. I was reminded that all limitations that I had were mental and that I could beat these feelings and survive this fast. I would go to sleep and wake up around 3am for Day 3.
Day 3 I was weak, restless and not sure how I would survive. The day before I was tempted to just lick salt just to get a different taste, but I didn’t. I wanted to stand on my word of just water. Day 3 had me purging whatever was left in me from Sunday. I had so many emotions and feelings. Some I shared with you on this blog. As I prepared for work my mind went blank. For a moment I didn’t think about the fast or getting through the day. I just went through the motions. My reminder was pockets of nausea or my sinking feeling inside. Then moments where I just felt weak and my head would hurt. Throughout today I faded off into space, nodded off or just needed to rest and breathe. My short prayers and encouragement is what kept me in the fight.
My fast was a lot like my life. Somedays it’s fine. I encounter headaches, pain and feel like I can’t go on. I misstep and feel like I lose my grip on reality. Somedays it’s hard to focus and be strong. What I was reminded of during the fast is that as long as I keep pushing, never give up on myself and if I keep talking to God, I will definitely survive. It’s going to hurt. Everyday my road has a chance to get rough. How I deal with it is how life will deal with me. If I refuse to be defeated, I won’t be. I just have to stay my course and keep my faith.
As I sit here, weak and weary I feel validated. I also feel stronger than ever. I put myself to an ultimate test and passed. I truly have the ability to do absolutely anything I put my mind to. This was a firm reminder of that. I didn’t break, bend or fold. I didn’t submit, alter or change. I didn’t cheat, reroute or start over. I went from point A to point B and I know I’m better for it.
I can’t believe I fasted. And one day, I will believe I fasted again.
It’s now September 6 12:01. God, Thank You.