Yesterday, I got some news that took my spirit down a few more notches than I expected. You never know how much you want something until you can’t get it. I made several real plans around a move and a moment and it’s officially not going to happen. I don’t understand why. All I want to do is be what I see in my mind. Sometimes things happen and they make you think your vision is all wrong.
Maybe that was going to hinder something else I really want. Maybe this isn’t the step that’s needed. Maybe winter isn’t the right time for all of this. Maybe I shouldn’t be in pursuit of this now.
I don’t have any answers, just disappointment. This was a forgone conclusion to me. Was I over confident? Was it just simply not my time? Only lord knows. The only thing I do know, is that giving up on myself or my goal would be stupid. And I don’t want to do anything stupid.